Resources
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Remembering my Roots
An exercise for grounding in uncertain times
Courtesy of: Amy Brandt, LMFT, Breeze Potts, LMHC and Kellie Furlan, LMFT
An exercise for grounding in uncertain times
Courtesy of: Amy Brandt, LMFT, Breeze Potts, LMHC and Kellie Furlan, LMFT
Key:
Along the ground level, note things that you can appreciate and routinely bring your awareness to that keep you grounded. Things you taste, feel, see, smell or hear. Examples might be the sound of birds in your neighborhood, the feel of your dog’s fur as you pet her, the taste of hot tea, or the smell of clean cotton.
Among the root branches, differentiate one that refers to your personal traits and skills in handling adversity (if you are struggling here – begin with a timeline remembering when you came through hard things. Then proceed with reflecting on, ‘how did I come through that? What qualities did I demonstrate or how did I grow? What did I lean into for support?. Differentiate another root that refers to traits evidenced multi-generationally in your family legacy. Perhaps you notice in your family legacy an ability to stick together, resourcefulness or flexibility. Differentiate a third root that refers to historical or fictional figures who have inspired you by their character in times of difficulty. Examples of inspirational figures might include a grandmother, Abraham Lincoln, Maya Angelou, Katniss Everdeen or Frodo Baggins. Now write the traits that you remember and appreciate that you can draw on to fortify you and give you strength. Examples of traits might be determination, creativity, or faith or self-sacrifice. Keep in mind that the roots of your tree represent something that lies beneath the surface but are worth remembering because they are a resource in the winds of adversity. These are the convictions, values and traits that help you remain rooted in times of difficulty.
Along the bottom of your roots you may consider adding a water source to represent what gives you a deeper sense of the sacredness of life and makes important meaning out of suffering and loss that are an inevitable part of the experience of life. If you are uncertain how you make meaning out of suffering in a way that gives you courage, you might consider that some traditions offer that suffering is the result of resisting what is, and healing begins with acceptance. Some traditions offer that beyond the immediacy of the pain there is a God who loves you and can give you strength for the day. Some traditions offer that suffering and loss are opportunities in disguise...opportunities for growth, love, community and human ingenuity.
Grief
http://www.rememberingpractices.com/pdf/insight%20magazine.pdf
Recovery from Abusive Relationships
(For women) When Love Hurts, Cory & McAndless-Davis
Recovery from Divorce
Fresh Start Divorce Recovery Book, Burns and Whiteman
Mom’s House Dad’s House, Isolina Ricci
(For kids) Dinosaurs Divorce, Marc Brown
Raising Kids
Love and Logic, Magic for Early Childhood, Foster Cline
Parenting with Love and Logic, Foster Cline
Boundaries with Teens, Townsend
Wise Minded Parenting, Laura Kastner, Ph.D.
Eating Disorders and negative body image:
When women stop hating their bodies, Jane Hirchmann and Carol Hunter
Biting the Hand that Starves You, Maisel, Epston and Borden
Brave Girl Eating, Harriet Brown
Trouble with Communication
Developing Healthy Relationships with self and others
Changes that Heal, John Townsend and Henry Cloud
Safe People, John Townsend and Henry Cloud
Boundaries, John Townsend and Henry Cloud
The Seven Principals for Making your Marriage Work, Dr. John Gottman
Family Ties that Bind: A self-help guide to change, Ronald Richardson
Crucial Conversations, Grenny, Patterson, McMillan, Switzler
Forgive and Forget, Lewis Smedes
Local Help Lines
For the phone numbers and organizations that can help locally, click here.
Are you ready to take a step toward change?
Click here to request a free consultation or call Bellingham Family Counseling today at (360) 325-1717.